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Psst! Wanna buy a tweet?

This writer offers his first tweet for sale at a snip

By Ricky Browne

Good news! Great even! After much deliberation I have decided to sell my very first tweet on Twitter for a mere £20,000.

This, as any art connoisseur and follower of the news will realise is a great deal – and will no doubt bring the tweet collector untold riches in the future, when my fame as a great writer of the 21st century increases – as it is bound to do.

Jack Dorsey’s first tweet sold for US$2.9 million… mine’s dirt cheap in comparison

My decision comes in the wake of Jack Dorsey, the founder and head of Twitter, selling his first tweet for just over US$2.9 million on Monday.

His all important tweet read: “just setting up my twttr” . His Dorsey first tweet was made on March 21, 2006. 

That bold idea to remove the vowels from the word twitter was just pure genius – and showed the concern that would later plague users of keeping keystrokes to a bare minimum. That move alone probably added a cool US$ million to the price tag.

Here’s a photo of it. But remember, you don’t own this. It’s just a facsimile.

This is just a facsimile so don’t get excited

Now, I may be selling myself short by offering my tweet at such a low price. But I think I have a duty not only to my back pocket, but also to humanity as a whole. And I want to give back to my fans, by offering this tweet at such a bargain.

The preservation of my tweet should help to build-up world-wide respect for the new art form of tweets.

But, caveat emptor! Or buyer beware for those of my readers who aren’t as fluent in Latin as myself.

I joined Twitter in June 2009, and I’ve made some 1,135 tweets over that period. Most of them pure gold, and some of them probably platinum.

But unfortunately I can’t find my first tweet – which could be the most valuable of all.

My search for my tweet got the following result:

No results for “Ricky Browne 2009”

The term you entered did not bring up any results. You may have mistyped your term or your Search settings could be protecting you from some potentially sensitive content.”

I’m not sure if this is result is actually mine to sell or not – but I am willing to sell a reproduction of it for £1,000. Please enquire within.

But back to my original tweet, and its current location in space unkown.

Not to worry. I’m sure the tweet said something rather profound – like “Hello world! This is my first tweet!”. I’d be willing to replicate that for the happy buyer, until the original is actually found.

In the meantime, I am willing to sell the first of my more than 1,000 tweets that I can actually find. It reads:

Ricky Browne

@Obedia

·

Dec 19, 2013

OPA sizzles! Greek restaurant diversifies Kingston – Food – Jamaica Gleaner – Thursday | December 19, 2013 http://jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20131219/cook/cook1.html#.UrL4GUjD7pI.twitter

Please remember, like the above, this is not the real thing – as a copy it may be worthless.

Unfortunately, I didn’t write the restaurant review myself, but this tweet should be of special interest to the burgeoning Greek community in Jamaica, which at last count had a population of about one – Alexx Antaeus, the owner of OPA Greek Restaurant – which is now at the prestigious Devon House. But  do know at least one other person of Greek heritage in Jamaica, so maybe Marina Delfos would be interested?

Alexx demonstrated correct plate breaking technique in a photo from the Gleaner story.

Or indeed, any collector of my work, especially my tweets, may want to jump on this train before it leaves the station.

I’ll part with that for a bargain basement price of £10,000 – for a limited time only. Or, if you prefer a cyber currency for a cyber tweet, which only seems fair, I’ll part with it for a single bitcoin.

I wonder what US President Donald Trump’s first tweet would sell for? We may never know, as Twitter closed his account – removing from humanity the ability for us to track history through his tweets.

One bitcoin, that’s my final offer

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